THE FOG BENDER

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emppalp: This is a robot - not intelligent per se, but rather impressive in its abilities to respond to certain functions such as simple conversation or tasks like folding laundry and such. Many say we’re about 30 years away from basically autonomous robotic “people” living among us. You know what that means, right? FUCKBOTS. This will undoubtedly be one of the most popular functions of autonomous robots in the future, because as animals, we have the insatiable and intrinsic desire to spread our seed. But beyond fucking a toaster, think of what this could mean. The internet has brought many people closer together while paradoxically at the same time torn them farther apart (this social web site is one of those examples. I know many people who spend almost the entire day glued to the screen instead of talking to people in front of them for whatever reason). So what happens when they make COMPANION robots? Ones that are programmed to love you. Say you’re a lonely person and you just never had any luck and never got married but you desperately wanted that feeling. You could buy a lovebot that would obey your EVERY command, would love you unconditionally, would never leave your side. You would be its king, and it your subject. That’s rather perverse, no? Is that real love? If the person is genuinely happy with this machine programmed to think of you as the greatest thing ever, is that narcissistic? Morally wrong? I’m not sure. I think it’d be interesting to see vacation pictures of a guy with a robot on the beach sipping martinis while the robot gives him a handjob and the guy just looks happy as fuck. I don’t know if that’s good or bad for humanity but we seem to fuck everything up anyway so why not let the lonely have some fuckbots, ya know? Via Roseanne with Shark Teeth

emppalp:

This is a robot - not intelligent per se, but rather impressive in its abilities to respond to certain functions such as simple conversation or tasks like folding laundry and such.

Many say we’re about 30 years away from basically autonomous robotic “people” living among us. You know what that means, right?

FUCKBOTS.

This will undoubtedly be one of the most popular functions of autonomous robots in the future, because as animals, we have the insatiable and intrinsic desire to spread our seed.

But beyond fucking a toaster, think of what this could mean. The internet has brought many people closer together while paradoxically at the same time torn them farther apart (this social web site is one of those examples. I know many people who spend almost the entire day glued to the screen instead of talking to people in front of them for whatever reason).

So what happens when they make COMPANION robots? Ones that are programmed to love you. Say you’re a lonely person and you just never had any luck and never got married but you desperately wanted that feeling. You could buy a lovebot that would obey your EVERY command, would love you unconditionally, would never leave your side. You would be its king, and it your subject.

That’s rather perverse, no? Is that real love? If the person is genuinely happy with this machine programmed to think of you as the greatest thing ever, is that narcissistic? Morally wrong? I’m not sure.

I think it’d be interesting to see vacation pictures of a guy with a robot on the beach sipping martinis while the robot gives him a handjob and the guy just looks happy as fuck.

I don’t know if that’s good or bad for humanity but we seem to fuck everything up anyway so why not let the lonely have some fuckbots, ya know?


  1. funbunny said: Fuckbots will be the end of the human race. Obese, World-of-Warcraft players will never have cause to clean themselves up and find living girlfriends. Who will procreate? We’d doomed.
  2. blatherlikeme said: Now I’m thinking. There are lots of interesting repercussions. If they are programmed to love you, maybe people get happier. Or we reduce the population as more people choose robot sex. Or rich people get robots and poor people get smart vibrators.
  3. botanicazilla said: oh my.
  4. apieceofmine said: Eek….not a good thing I don’t think. But inevitable.
  5. juiceboxjesus said: I was just looked at a website for these the other day. THEY HAVE EXCHANGEABLE TITTIES THAT CAN BE HONEY FLAVORED! I might get one…
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